Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome to this Empty Nest Life where your next chapter begins. Join Jay Ramsden, the inspiring voice behind the Empty Nest Coach on TikTok and Instagram, as he leads you on a transformative journey through the uncharted seas of midlife and empty nesting. In each episode, jay thoughtfully unravels the threads of change, growth and self-discovery that come with embracing your new normal. Together, you'll explore the endless opportunities that await you, proving that life doesn't end in your 40s, 50s or beyond it begins again. Here's your host the Emptiness Coach, jay Ramston.

Speaker 2: 0:36

Hey there, my Emptiness friends. Today we're going to explore a powerful topic, the one I believe is the key to an amazing life. It's finding clarity for what you want your empty nest life to look like. As your children grow and they fly the nest, it's not uncommon to feel a sense of loss and uncertainty. You might even experience a bit of excitement. That's okay. But without clarity on what you want in life, all of it, all of it the loss, the uncertainty, the excitement, no matter what it is can leave you feeling a little bit stuck. So if you're feeling rudderless, if you're a little unsure of what your life looks like now that the kids have left home, know that you're not alone. Together we're going to navigate this new chapter. We're going to explore some self-reflection, we're going to do personal growth, and I believe it's time for boundless opportunities in your life. Now. Getting clear on what you want from your emptiness life, I believe, is the key. It's the key to finding joy, it's the key to finding fulfillment, and today I'm going to be sharing some of my own experiences, some insights, with you to help guide you along the way, and I'm also going to have some self-reflection prompts woven throughout to help you. So go ahead and grab a notebook, find a comfy spot and let's get started.

Speaker 2: 2:02

Change well, we know it. It can be challenging, but I also believe that it can be a transformative experience. As parents, we devote so much of our lives to raising our kids that when they leave, it's pretty easy to feel lost, right? The day-to-day shuffle has changed the momentum, the energy in the house, whatever you want to call it. It's different, but consider this. Change can also be an opportunity for growth. It can be an opportunity for exploration and it can be an opportunity to rediscover pieces of yourself. Take a moment to think about the feelings you're experiencing right now. What emotions come to the surface when you think about your kids leaving home? Now, if you're able to go ahead and write down your thoughts, you can press pause if you want to, but what I want to know is what's coming up for you. Feelings are such an important indicator of what you need to focus on or where you could focus, as you feel like you're struggling Now. I don't want you to think that, if you're feeling sad, for example, that you need to find joy, right. That might be where you ultimately go right. We all want to have joy and happiness in our life. But there could be some sort of intermediary step. Maybe it's just finding contentment with one aspect of your life and if that's the case, what is it? What is it Now?

Speaker 2: 3:33

Reflecting on my own life, I remember when my wife took on a new role a few years ago Now. I was suddenly faced with the reality of my own changing circumstances. So, rather than being overwhelmed and I was at first right Change can happen, these things can happen. But rather than being overwhelmed, I viewed it as a chance to pivot, take a different direction in my life. So I decided to embrace entrepreneurship. Now, this allowed me to support my wife, but also allowed me to support other people in my life, to be able to be available to folks in a way that I couldn't be before. But it also allowed me to fill my life with purpose and this newfound freedom. It enabled me to prioritize my family's well-being while also pursuing new passions. Now I get it. I get it. I get it.

Speaker 2: 4:26

Change can be daunting, but it can also be the catalyst for redefining your life. So I believe an essential part of this journey is understanding what your values are. Part of this journey is understanding what your values are what truly matters to you right now? Is it possibly the freedom to explore new interests, or is it the ability to support loved ones when they need help? Maybe it's prioritizing your health and well-being? Whatever it may be, we're going to start there, right? I want you to consider what values resonate with you the most and, if you need to think back to a time that you felt fulfilled before kids, what was happening then? Make a note of it.

Speaker 2: 5:11

For me and my journey, I realized that helping others is at the core of who I am. It has been my entire life. It doesn't matter if I was a kid, a teenager, the first jobs that I have, they all kind of focus around helping other people, and this realization shaped my choices, from not only supporting my wife's career change, but also to caring for my mother-in-law after she had a fall. Being available to my family and friends to help that is what motivates me in my life, and thus now I'm pretty clear on that, right. I'm pretty clear on how to make that happen for me. So here's your first self-reflection.

Speaker 2: 5:52

Go back to your values. What are your top three choices? What are your top three values in your life Like? What do you value most about your life and then, how do those values align with the life you envision in your emptiness life? Is there anything that's connected? Out of whack? It's different. Is there something missing in your life that is an obstacle to living out those values? Take some time to think about that. I want you to identify your values, because your values will create the foundation for the new direction and it'll help you picture how you want to fill your time and it'll help you figure out what gives you energy as you move forward in life.

Speaker 2: 6:33

My values led me to embrace experiences, experiences like traveling and embarking on adventures and meeting new people and trying new things. Now that you have a clearer understanding of your values, it's time to explore perhaps passions or activities that align with those values. I'm a big believer in exploration like this. I call it being intentionally curious, and the more that you're intentionally curious with your life, the more things will unfold for you. You know, maybe right now, maybe it's time to revisit something you once loved to do, or maybe it's time to dive into something you've always wanted to do or something you've wanted to explore. For me, this meant an adventure to climb Mount Kilimanjaro last year and it also means planning a walk to walk the Camino de Santiago in May of 2025, of this coming year. Now, these experiences not only offer me joy, but they also offer me opportunities to connect with fellow travelers and learn from diverse perspectives, and learn new cultures and to see the world, all of which are things that I enjoy. I enjoy those things in life and I'm working towards making the most of my emptiness life, knowing what I want to do, knowing what I value.

Speaker 2: 7:55

So what activities ignite your excitement? So what activities ignite your excitement? Go ahead, create a list of five things you'd love to try, and I want you not to censor yourself. There's no restrictions here. It's not time and money bound. Let your imagination run free and if you feel blocked, like if it's not coming to you, if you feel blocked in this self-reflection, set a timer for five minutes and just write, write, write, write, write whatever comes to your mind, write until the timer expires or until you have nothing left to write, like your brain is just totally empty. Now I can speak from experience that a journey of exploration like this one can be incredibly rewarding, and as you experiment with new interests, you might also discover, maybe, some hidden talents or passions that could lead to new opportunities in your life.

Speaker 2: 8:44

A crucial part of navigating this next chapter, I believe, is your physical and mental well-being. We're at a time in our lives where you look forward, and you can see it in your parents, if they're still alive. You look at what's happening down the road. So something that I recently heard from someone is that they envision their 90-year-old selves each morning when they wake up and they ask their current self like am I doing everything I can to support that version of myself? Right? Will that version of myself be happy with me in the life that I'm living right now? So I choose to prioritize health and wellness in my life.

Speaker 2: 9:21

I incorporated walking and strength training and yoga and hiking and meditation and other ways to move my body into my routine. Now, these activities not only keep me fit, but they also help alleviate stress and cultivate a positive mindset. But they also help alleviate stress and cultivate a positive mindset. This is an important component for you to consider as well, because, as empty nesters, taking care of ourselves becomes even more vital, and the reason is it enables us to be present for our loved ones while also pursuing our dreams with some vigor. Right, yeah, we can do both. So what does your health and wellness mean to you right now?

Speaker 2: 10:01

Consider the physical activities you're doing, the mental practices, the nutritional choices you're making, the things that nourish your mind and body, and take a moment, write down those habits, like what are the current ones, and identify one or two areas you'd like to improve. And I'm not talking like these drastic changes, because you can take time right. Progress, not perfection. Every step has purpose. Little, tiny things, you know, those are my things I talk about. So making small changes can yield significant results over time, whether it's the beginning or the end of your journey, like wherever you are in this journey, if they're trying to begin a daily walk or trying a new fitness class, or you're practicing some mindfulness and meditation, like. All of these adjustments can support your overall well-being and set a strong foundation for your emptiness life. Another thing to keep in mind is that your children grow and move on.

Speaker 2: 10:49

The dynamics of your relationships will also inevitably shift, not just with your kids, but with your partner, your spouse, spouse, your friends, other people in your life, and it's an excellent opportunity to deepen connections with your partner or your friends, or even to start forging new relationships in your life. It's totally possible, right. The stronger that you can build your support network, the more empowered you can be, and it helps foster ongoing personal growth for you, the more that you have connections in your life. So take a moment right now in this stage of life, and reflect on the friendships that have enriched your life right now, or perhaps new connections you'd like to explore. For me, for instance, like being an entrepreneur moving out of education and into the coaching spaces, it has opened doors to me meeting new and interesting people. It's also helped me expand my circle in unexpected ways, with unexpected results and unexpected pluses in my life. When you meet other people, you see how different people live in different ways and different thought processes, and it can only help you grow. So take a moment.

Speaker 2: 12:02

Take a moment to think about your relationship. Who in your life brings you joy right now? Who do you want to spend more time with? Write a list of three people you want to connect with today and then think of a way you can reach out to them this week as you rebuild and cultivate the relationship that we're talking about. Go ahead and consider some activities you can share with friends and families, whether it's planning a weekend getaway or simply hosting a dinner party. All of these things, all of these reconnections and connections. They can enrich your life and provide precious support during this life transition.

Speaker 2: 12:35

Now that you've reflected on your values, you maybe explored some of your passions. You talked about prioritizing your wellness and we talked about nurturing relationships. It's time to set some goals in some of these areas, because having clear intentions will help you guide you toward a fulfilling emptiness life. I believe this. So we're going to begin by creating a vision board or, if that's not your thing, write a detailed description of what you want your life to look like in the next few years. Visualize your aspirations. Maybe it's travel destinations or activities you want to pursue, or milestones you want to reach in your health journey. Whatever it may be, let the visualization serve as a way to motivate you. Now that you have that vision, write down three to five specific goals you want to achieve in the coming year, and make sure you include smaller, more attainable goals as well as larger aspirations, and then what steps you can take to start working towards these goals.

Speaker 2: 13:30

Today, I want you to remember that setting goals is not about perfection. We're not trying to be perfect here. We're not trying to elevate ourselves to some perfect individual. It's just not attainable, it's not going to happen. But it's about the progress, it's about enjoying the journey. When you break these goals into actionable steps and you achieve those steps, make sure you celebrate them, even the tiny ones, even the small ones. Celebrate everything. My emptiness friends, please don't forget this important thing as well Life is dynamic, right? And while we may have these plans, you might be using this episode to create great goals for you.

Speaker 2: 14:09

Also be adaptable. It's important to be adaptable because it allows you to thrive and change right. It also doesn't mean that you shouldn't try new things right. Don't sit there and go well, if things are going to change or I don't know what's coming up in my life, maybe I shouldn't start doing something new. No, please do right, absolutely start something new right, because I want you to remember like this is a reminder that you can embrace your emptiness life while also encountering ups and downs. I can't stress enough that flexibility is a skill that will greatly serve you in these next years and, if needed, reflect on how you've managed any change in the past. What techniques have helped you cope with that uncertainty? What's worked for you. If you can embrace the adaptability of what you've done before, it can ensure you remain open to new impossibilities along your journey when things come up.

Speaker 2: 15:02

I also want you to think about a time when you face an unexpected challenge. How did you manage your response and what did you learn from that experience? Can any of those insights be applied to your current situation? And finally, I want to encourage you to approach your life with curiosity. Be willing to adjust your course as new opportunities arise. Be willing to pivot. Don't be so stuck in your ways that you can't look at new things and go. Is this something I can change? Is this something I can improve? Is this something I can tweak? Because embracing the unexpected can lead you to experiences beyond your wildest dreams.

Speaker 2: 15:40

As we wrap up today's episode on finding clarity in your emptiness life, remember this journey is about rediscovery.

Speaker 2: 15:47

It's about renewal. It's about finding joy and by reflecting on your values, by exploring new passions and prioritizing your well-being, getting reconnected to folks in your lives, setting some goals and embracing flexibility, you are going to carve out just an amazing, vibrant and fulfilling future, and you can start today. Let's start right now. Every single step you take towards clarity and personal growth will move you closer to embracing this exciting chapter. Remember to approach this journey with patience and grace, because it is a continuous unfolding, twisting, turning season of life that is like no other. And before I wrap up today's episode, I want to invite you to subscribe to my newsletter. Each week I share insights and tips that can help you be more empowered in your personal development journey. As an empty nester, if you visit wwwjasonramstoncom slash newsletter, you can subscribe today. Thank you for joining me on this exploration today. I hope you feel inspired and ready to take action and until next time, stay curious, stay motivated and remember that the best is yet to come.

Speaker 1: 17:09

Are you ready to start living and enjoying your empty nest years? If so, head over to jasonramsdencom and click work with me to get the conversation started. Let's make your life lighter, brighter and full of joy and purpose again. This Empty Nest Life is a production of Impact. One Media LLC. All rights reserved.